SaltWire E-Edition

Get to the bottom of bullying

ELLIE TESHER

Q– I’m a guy, 18, in first-year university. I recently returned home for a few days, studying and getting over a mild cold. One afternoon, the bell rang, and it was a friend of my little sister’s.

She handed me a package and told me to give it to Sarah for her to wear “to the party”. I looked at her funny and said that Sarah lives four houses down the road. She laughed and ran away with the package.

When my mom came home from work, I told her what happened. She was appalled! Apparently, the girl who’d come over was having a party and my sister wasn’t invited.

Her “accidental” drop-off was meant as a taunt for my sister!

I’m so mad and feel so badly for my sister.

What should we do about this?

Big Brother

(PS: I changed the kid’s name on purpose.)

A– You’ve already learned a great deal more about decency and fairness than that younger girl who “taunted” your sister.

By not giving Sarah’s real name you purposely chose to not out her publicly, despite your anger at her meanness towards your sister.

(By the way, I, too, don’t name people in this column. It’s people’s relationship behaviour that matters).

Meanwhile, your younger sister, whom you obviously care about a lot, has to deal with this blatant insult. Due to a forthcoming party that includes other girls she’ll know and likely sees regularly at school, leaving her out is tantamount to bullying.

Why? When everyone present realizes that she’s not included, the question, “why not?” will be raised or all the other guests already know this was done purposefully.

You’re the lead in recognizing how devastating this exclusion can feel to a young girl.

Still, I believe that you should involve your mother, if possible, in the next step to resolving this mean-spirited matter.

She should approach “Sarah’s” parents, along with you, so that the information you repeat are the exact words the girl presented to you, laughing then running away.

If told matter-of-factly, with concern for both your sister and the neighbour’s daughter – because bullying gets known and dealt with by the school – hopefully the mother will talk to her daughter about this and insist on inviting your sister.

If it’s too late for the party, it’s even more important that the incident’s addressed – both to “Sarah’s” parents and the school, especially to the girls’ teachers who may’ve already noticed this excluding behaviour.

CULTURE

en-ca

2021-12-01T08:00:00.0000000Z

2021-12-01T08:00:00.0000000Z

https://saltwire.pressreader.com/article/282291028512962

SaltWire Network