Has leaving gratuity reached tipping point?

I was recently chatting with family members when the subject of tipping came up.

They mentioned a man visiting Nova Scotia from another country was surprised when, at the end of a restaurant meal, he was confronted with a debit machine that automatically suggested an 18, 20 or 30 per cent tip.

He punched the 18 per cent button but later asked my family members what the tipping expectation is in this part of the world.

It likely depended on who he asked. Both of my daughters who have worked in restaurants have discovered that many diners have a different approach to tipping than they and their friends do.

My older daughter chose a restaurant server job over another minimum wage job solely because of the possibility of earning tips. When you’re renting an apartment in Halifax and paying for university, every penny counts.

She mentioned that most people do not leave a tip when picking up takeout, even though the kitchen staff had to do the same work to prepare the food and she had to pack up everything to go instead of putting it on a plate.

I don’t think I’m alone in admitting that I have not added a tip to takeout orders in the past. My habit of not tipping for takeout likely started to change when those debit machines with automatic tip options became more widespread. It was during the COVID-19 lockdowns, though, when I consciously started adding a 20 per cent tip to takeout orders.

I read social media accounts from servers and kitchen staff who were struggling to make ends meet even though they showed up to work every day, risking their health during a pandemic. They observed how people didn’t feel the need to tip on takeout meals, which then made up the majority or, in some cases, the entirety of the restaurant’s orders.

Soon, I noticed the tip option popping up on the debit machine at fast-food restaurants. Even at the drive-thru, where tipping used to be discouraged and you were told instead to put your spare change in the jar for the company’s charitable cause, I was now confronted with automatic tip options. Where do those drivethru window tips go, to the staff or to Ronald Mcdonald House?

My daughter told us, too, that tips added to orders placed through thirdparty delivery systems like Uber Eats and Doordash go to those company’s drivers. There were many nights when most of her restaurant’s orders came this way, and the staff making and packing the meals made no tips at all. That’s something I never considered when placing orders on those sites.

Of course, the real solution to this conundrum is that restaurant staff (and every other worker) should be paid a living wage and tips shouldn’t even come into it. I do sometimes resent paying an extra 20 per cent on top of a meal that is already much more expensive than it was a year ago due to rising food costs when I know the restaurant’s owner lives much more luxuriously than I do. I guess that’s how they earned those Mcmansions and yachts, by paying as little and charging as much as they can get away with.

But then there are others who can’t even afford the meal I just paid for, let alone the tip or the babysitting costs to go out and enjoy it. And some of them may be working at the very restaurant where I placed the order.